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SOCIALLY DISTANT DOUBLES

Stay alert, go to work, don’t go to work, stay at home, home is where the heart is, live laugh love, eat pray love, love Tennis, play Tennis, from Wednesday you can play Tennis for twenty hours a day if you like, unless it’s with someone from outside your household, actually no, Dominic, Dom, scrap that, you can choose one person to be with outside your household, so what I’d suggest doing is holding open auditions to see when it all comes down to it, who’s really worth the hassle? Is it Mummy or Daddy? Is it your fella or your weird Uncle? Is it your Grandmother or your side-piece? 

A mess.

I do not need to be reminded to stay alert — I’m a kid who wears a mustard shirt, sports a tinsel fringe and wears white socks on the streets of North Liverpool. I am a brother who watches his big sister wash her face after four night shifts of watching people die and cry for their loved ones goodbyes while her face is cracked with the combined dents of stress, sweat and face masks. I am a son with underlying health conditions, raised by a front-line working Father with his own long-term medical issues, sharing a home with a full-time NHS working Mother. I know what alert means, my life depends on it.

Boris Johnson I know you know how important language is, especially in the midst of chaos. Your slogan GET BREXIT DONE was shouted more times than you shout Churchill catchphrases at yourself in the bedroom mirror each morning. Boris is not a Machiavellian genius, but, as is the Conservative Party way, he is making the most vulnerable in our society pay for his government’s mishandling and he is deliberately using frustratingly vague language and ridding the press briefing of journalists to avoid any culpability.

After watching on Sunday night it dawned on me that a scriptwriter has been paid, probably a lovely sum, to create 15 minutes of nonsense with no safety guidelines for workplaces transforming their environments with 12 hours notice, no information for parents without childcare, nothing for the disabled or at risk who are already isolating who cannot work and who may not be able to survive if the rumoured deductions to furlough go ahead. What was clear, however, was that this government is prioritising profits over people, this government is unleashing a mercenary attack on the working classes, and Boris Johnson would rather leave terrified Britons to resort to Google or Twitter for information than say something that may bruise his re-election chances.

Boris Johnson is not fit to run this country. There should be screams for his departure when this pandemic eases up. This is a man who has helmed Britain’s lead to the highest death toll in Europe and his apparent “success” includes failure to meet testing targets, still no adequate PPE and more NHS staff and care workers dying from coronavirus than the number of British Military personnel that died during the Iraq War. His leadership has meant we entered the lockdown as a United Kingdom but the divergence in policy has led to different routes being taken in England, Scotland, Northern Ireland and Wales so which country is following the science? He created a cabinet to enable a quick BREXIT. They are not politicians with real intellect, skill or experience, they are puppets who repeat simplistic messaging on podiums in Boris’s absence or are routinely sacrificed to Piers Morgan on morning television. Instead of assembling advisory boards with previous ministers of real intellect, no, Boris Johnson chooses a Trumpian form of politics and it is his narcissism that is causing tremendous risk to the livelihoods of many British people and to our democracy at large.

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